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Kill The Children

Kill The Children

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Comedic Monologue originally from 20/20 Action
Written by Matti McLean
Originally performed by AJ Paluzzi

Comedic / Open Gender / Dark Humour

Someone is meeting up with their potential first date for the first time and must figure out how to not be off-putting.
Originally performed by a man, but this is open gender. 


Oh! Hello! How are you doing today? Thanks for stopping. No one stops anymore! No one!
They just keep on walking. So you stopped and that’s great! Sorry, I’m just surprised someone
actually stopped. Hello! I want to talk to you about kids. How many kids are out there do you
think? There’s millions of them. Billions of them! All over the world there are so many kids.
And we need your help. To get rid of them.
Our charity wants to take all of those extra children, all of those millions and billions of
children, and get rid of them. I mean where did they all come from? We don’t know! But we’re
going to send them back there! Imagine how good you can feel knowing that you helped to
take care of those children. I mean other charities take care of the children. We "take care" of
the children.

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